And then our world fell apart

It is already the second anniversary of this horrible day. Two years of trying to live a new life without Abi with us, yet she still feels so close. I wanted to reshare this as it sums up the day our world fell apart.

It is exactly a year ago today that Abi came downstairs looking pale and complained she felt really ill. Exactly a year since our world was turned upside down and inside out.


I never really imagined what this day would be like, despite people telling me ‘all the anniversaries will be hard’.

Anniversaries? Anniversaries are a time to celebrate or commemorate something. A time to think of only that person or event, which you can forget about the rest of the year.

It’s not an anniversary of a year without Abi, it’s an anniversary of the day our entire world was shattered by something so totally unpredictable and traumatic.

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9 thoughts on “And then our world fell apart

  1. This is always going to be a day full of raw pain, you will remember every aspect of Abi’s birth, life and tragic death and time will not erase that pain. It will, however, make you more able to deal with it and less afraid of it. Is that what people mean by acceptance?
    Thinking of you as always xx

  2. Thinking of you and all your family.
    It will be two years in May since my Ruby died. But today is an anniversary of a day (many days actually) that she was alive. And so is tomorrow. And the day after that. And the day after. I guess I do what I can to take back the power and the control from my grief, to be empowered.
    I hope all those wonderful photos, film clips and memories of Abi fill your heart with love.
    With regards,

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  4. It is approaching 2 years since my 19 year old son Philip died suddenly. I have only found your blog recently but it has given me great comfort. You write so honestly and eloquently. I love to hear about Abi’s enthusiasm and zest for life – a truly remarkable girl I live in Adelaide South Australia but these issues are universal. We lived in Worcester for 12 months with our 3 boys and Philip our eldest did his Reception year there. It was 1999 the year Abi was born.

    • Hi Sue, I just wanted to thank you for your kind words and I’m so sorry that you lost Philip all too soon. I meet with another mum from Worcester who is sadly in the same situation as us. Two years is so soon in our journey, I’ve found it hard going. It is so comforting to know others and to feel supported.

      • Thankyou for your response. It’s incredible to be sharing our stories across the globe! Im sorry I got Abi’s birth year wrong . I realized the sums didn’t add up. 1999 was the year you were married. I knew I had read it somewhere!! That’s one of the things grief gives you – a foggy brain. And yet the pressure is always there to function normally xxx

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