Christians often talk a lot about finding joy in life’s difficulties and I always wondered what that meant and how on earth it was even possible. Surely God is playing games with us if He expects us to celebrate our suffering?! But I’ve begun to discover for myself what this truly means (and I mean begun because this one is so deep it needs a lifetime to grasp).
I read a short Bible passage which also talks about joy, James 1:2.
Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.
James 1: 2-3
I considered what it meant to seek joy in the trials life and persevering in that quest. At first it might seem as though this passage is more about having a stiff upper lip, being ‘happy’ no matter what and ignoring the emotions that come with difficulties.
A few weeks ago, a friend in our group went home to the Lord after a difficult and traumatic illness. We saw how her cancer developed, we prayed constantly for healing, we celebrated together on the better days and offered practical support on the difficult ones. I was priviledged to sit with her as she passed away, to know this woman’s courageous journey to her life’s end.
The day before she died, she was baptised in her hospital bed. This was something she wanted and when the moment came, she smiled for the first time in days. When I heard about this, I was so moved. To me, this was the kind of joy that James was talking about.
I then recalled my own daughter’s death. We turned off her life support and within 5 minutes she was wheeled off to theatre while the organ donation surgeons removed some of her organs. I remember being incredibly scared about seeing her dead, I had somehow coped with her on life support because she was at least warm and with us in some way. Yet, when we were shown into the room after the operation, she had been laid in a simple bed. I was immediately transfixed by the expression on her face. You see, she was smiling. It was so distinctive that it almost distracted us from the fact she was dead. But I knew instantly that she was in heaven. This expression was one of being somewhere lovely, the best place ever. The surgeons wanted to speak to us and entered the room. They both had tears in their eyes as they said they were amazed by her change of expression as they operated. These medical professionals couldn’t explain it and were incredibly moved. I believe Abi left us that expression so she could comfort us before going to be with Jesus.
That was joy. Pure joy.
I am still grieving her, I still suffer with bouts of anxiety and depression. I still have plenty of days where I wonder where the joy is… but God shows me the bigger picture. He shows me to keep on going, to not give up hope.
Chasing Dragonflies 