From cradle to grave

Today, I took my 9-year-old son to his football match. It’s normally Dad who does the football matches, but it had been almost a year since I’d seen my son play due to having the new baby and he asked if I’d go and watch him. He’s been appreciating some one-to-one time with me of […]

Read More

Halloween just got scary

[I didn’t post this blog about Halloween at the time, I suppose to avoid offending anyone or to put a damper on the fun, but reading back on it, it’s certainly worth sharing. It’s not a major worry for me now, and who knows how I’ll feel about it in the years to come, but […]

Read More

Coping (or rather not!) with a tween’s grief

I feel like I’ve been winded. My tummy feels tight. I am crying. The tears started and didn’t stop. The happy feeling dissolved. My heart hurts and I don’t know which way to turn. How to act for the best. An argument with my 11-year-old daughter caused this. I have to write – I really […]

Read More

Tears for Abi at bedtime

Perhaps it was because I’d just told my six-year-old son that he looked a bit like Abi when he gave me a cheeky grin.Β  It wasn’t to make him feel sad, it just slipped out. Is it bad to say things like that? I don’t know. Last night, my son was getting ready for bed […]

Read More

Child Benefit… a sore subject for the bereaved parent!

Oh the irony. Having just had a baby, I’ve finally got round to filling out the claim form for child benefit, the same day we receive our first correctly adjusted and reduced payment (for two children instead of three) following Abi’s death 14 months ago. Dealing with the Child Benefit department at HM Revenue and […]

Read More

A blob of gum

We cleaned our cars at the weekend, not a common occurrence I’m ashamed to admit especially with a newborn keeping our tired arms occupied enough, but after the recent sandy rain we couldn’t put it off any longer. However, there’s one spot in my car (the family estate) which I’ll never clean… the boot side […]

Read More

Double grief

Living with grief means that I often sit outside of myself and reflect on my troubled mind. I’ve recognised that my thoughts surrounding my grief are two-fold: I need to deal with the trauma, the post-traumatic stress, from both mine and Abi’s perspective. First there are my ‘selfish’ thoughts about what happened to ME, a […]

Read More

Do you want to build a snowman?

I recently sat down with my son and daughter to watch Frozen. I realise we’re rather late as it was a Christmas movie, but at the time we weren’t keen to see it (going to the cinema was just not fun anymore). So I put it on as an afternoon distraction for us on a […]

Read More

Guest blog: Collective emotion

[This article was written by my good friend Sali Green, reproduced with Sali’s kind permission] An unexplainable sadness hit a great many people on hearing of the death of Peaches Geldof. But is it unexplainable? Some feel surprised and uncomfortable that they become part of a collective grief over someone they never met. Others show […]

Read More