I feel like I’ve been winded. My tummy feels tight. I am crying. The tears started and didn’t stop. The happy feeling dissolved. My heart hurts and I don’t know which way to turn. How to act for the best. An argument with my 11-year-old daughter caused this. I have to write – I reallyContinueContinue reading “Coping (or rather not!) with a tween’s grief”
Category Archives: All About Abi
Memories of our last holiday together
As friends and family head off on half term holidays, I’m glad to have a relaxing week ahead with my children. But I feel a slight pang of envy, as I know we are in need of a proper holiday, but with the new baby I’d not had the strength to plan one. Who needsContinueContinue reading “Memories of our last holiday together”
Tears for Abi at bedtime
Perhaps it was because I’d just told my six-year-old son that he looked a bit like Abi when he gave me a cheeky grin. It wasn’t to make him feel sad, it just slipped out. Is it bad to say things like that? I don’t know. Last night, my son was getting ready for bedContinueContinue reading “Tears for Abi at bedtime”
Into eternal sleep… turning off life support
These words were hard to write (just a month after Abi died last year), and I expect are just as hard to read. But talking about dying matters to me. I know there are other parents going through this every day – saying goodbye to their baby or child, whatever age, whether expected or not.ContinueContinue reading “Into eternal sleep… turning off life support”
Organ donation: Abi’s parting gift
As Dying Matters Week draws to a close, I wanted to share with you my personal experience of organ donation. It’s vital we feel able to talk about aspects of death like this. I have shared, in quite some detail, the process that is necessary in order to donate organs to another – a dilemmaContinueContinue reading “Organ donation: Abi’s parting gift”
“Abi was beautiful and clever and wonderful”
Some days I feel a heavy sense of confusion with my grief and the effort of trying to hold myself and my family together with some kind of normality. Yet, it’s often on days like this, when a sort of gloom has set in, that I receive an unexpected message of comfort. It could beContinueContinue reading ““Abi was beautiful and clever and wonderful””
Press attention
At Abi’s first anniversary on 10th February, my contact at the local newspaper contacted me with an offer to run an update story on fundraising that had been done in Abi’s memory over the year. I was pleasantly surprised that he’d remembered and was happy to oblige. It would be good to once again recogniseContinueContinue reading “Press attention”
Say her name… but not too much, Mum!
One of the biggest challenges I think I’ve faced since Abi’s death is understanding my other children’s different reactions. Contrary to my posts about openly talking about Abi and avoiding the elephant in the room, the approach with our children has had to be carefully considered. Abi has always been in their lives. Her sisterContinueContinue reading “Say her name… but not too much, Mum!”
Olympic dreams
The start of the Winter Olympics has brought back memories of Abi’s excitement for the 2012 London Olympics. It is hard to know she is not here to watch this with us, no doubt she would have loved it. She followed the London Olympic events with interest and I can remember watching the amazing openingContinueContinue reading “Olympic dreams”
Tie a leopard-print ribbon…
Abi’s memorial has a cherry blossom tree next to it, but it’s only young, having been planted last May with her ashes. The first small buds are starting to form ready for springtime. So, while it’s still small and not much to look at, it is a poignant reminder that life carries on… Soon thereContinueContinue reading “Tie a leopard-print ribbon…”
Chasing Dragonflies 