(Jo Powell kindly shared this moving reflection some years ago. Sadly, Jo died in April 2023. I still miss her joyful face and caring nature very much. She was a very special human.) I was pacing the landing with my teething baby at 3am last night and all I could think of was you. AsContinueContinue reading “Guest post: Thoughts of loss and hope at Christmas”
Tag Archives: grief
Reinstating our children’s bedtime routine
The last time my hubby and I sat in front of the telly in the lounge with our children all in bed upstairs was around 4th February 2013, over three years ago. We always had a fairly reasonable bedtime routine for our three children. Upstairs around 8pm, get ready and then a story. As Abi and herContinueContinue reading “Reinstating our children’s bedtime routine”
Living with joy and sorrow when grieving for your child
After you’ve lost a child, you somehow find ways to live on. You don’t actively seek ways to help your situation, the adjustment sort of happens by itself. When people say to you ‘I don’t know how you cope’, you look at them blankly, and most likely simply say ‘I just do’. But it makesContinueContinue reading “Living with joy and sorrow when grieving for your child”
Take me home – a pop song prayer
When trying to rebuild a life that’s been broken – it can feel like you’re grappling in the darkness, utterly alone, tired, afraid. Even the simplest routines go out of sync, the pace of life seems five steps faster than what we can manage. We’re barely breathing. Fear, grief, faith, hope all mingle into a mess that leaves usContinueContinue reading “Take me home – a pop song prayer”
Fight or flight – coping with illness as a bereaved family
My personal anxiety is much better these days although I’m still on a minute dose of anti-anxiety drugs just to help me through the first months of having a newborn should it suddenly increase with my hormone surges. It seemed sensible to do this, keeping any risks to baby to a minimum but allowing me theContinueContinue reading “Fight or flight – coping with illness as a bereaved family”
Guest post: Born sleeping – 10 years of missing Amy
I’m sharing this post on behalf of a lovely friend, Louise, who lost her first child, Amy, 10 years ago. Louise has offered me much emotional support since my own loss and I have been inspired by her strength. Please read and appreciate the years of love and loss in these words and images. Thursday,ContinueContinue reading “Guest post: Born sleeping – 10 years of missing Amy”
A picture of health
This is a picture of Abi and me on holiday in about 2011. I love the health and happiness radiating from BOTH of us in this picture. Of course, there was never any sign that Abi would have a brain haemorrhage two years later but what struck me when I saw this was not Abi particularly,ContinueContinue reading “A picture of health”
The expectations of a grieving mother on special days
Now that Mother’s Day has passed, I feel I can exhale. I have a little more breathing space (until Father’s Day which is another tough one). I posted on Facebook yesterday about how hard I find the run of ‘special (bloody) days’ I face. It feels like I’m charging at each one like it’s a brickContinueContinue reading “The expectations of a grieving mother on special days”
What happens when we die? Explaining death to your child
When thinking about death we have so many questions and very few answers. It’s where the fear and disbelief stem from. Children are renown for saying exactly, and frankly, what’s on their minds. They also have questions which we can find hard to answer, especially when our grief is so raw and we feel lost inContinueContinue reading “What happens when we die? Explaining death to your child”
Loving my children after losing my child
While, of course, I loved my children before Abi died, that love has changed quite dramatically since. I gave birth to Abi, back in 2000, and it wasn’t long before my second child was on her way. She arrived when Abi was 22 months old. Back then, I worked 4 days a week and my husbandContinueContinue reading “Loving my children after losing my child”
Chasing Dragonflies 