An elephant in the room

  There’s an elephant in the room. It is large and squatting, So it is hard to get around it. Yet we squeeze by with “How are you?” And “I’m fine” And a thousand other forms of trivial chatter. We talk about the weather. We talk about work. We talk about everything – except theContinueContinue reading “An elephant in the room”

Say her name… but not too much, Mum!

One of the biggest challenges I think I’ve faced since Abi’s death is understanding my other children’s different reactions. Contrary to my posts about openly talking about Abi and avoiding the elephant in the room, the approach with our children has had to be carefully considered. Abi has always been in their lives. Her sisterContinueContinue reading “Say her name… but not too much, Mum!”

Surviving grief

Surviving my bereavement is not something I feel I’ve achieved by any means, yet, but I am beginning to see that in order to survive the loss of my child, I’ve needed to find and maintain a balance between grieving and living. ‘Surviving’ feels like an unusual word to use when I consider that it’sContinueContinue reading “Surviving grief”

Fundraising … far more than charity

A few days after Abi died, we were already thinking about how we could somehow give something back to the people who helped her, and as a way to remember her life. It’s hard to explain why, while sat in a hospital waiting room with my daughter still with us, I had this urge toContinueContinue reading “Fundraising … far more than charity”

Guest blog: To my grieving sister… (a poem)

A beautiful poem written by my older sister in a comment, which I think deserves a post of its own. I live each day with you, understanding the pain, Will life ever one day, be the same? Each heartbreaking moment reliving what was, Life as we knew it burst into dust. Is there a light,ContinueContinue reading “Guest blog: To my grieving sister… (a poem)”

Counting your blessings after the death of your child

At times in the past year, I’ve heard it suggested that at least we have our other children to keep us going. It’s never said to mean that Abi’s death was any less distressing, but as a way to comfort and reassure. I’ve often thought this myself too. When I feel mournful, I consider howContinueContinue reading “Counting your blessings after the death of your child”