The title of this post might seem odd. Perhaps it should read ‘How could you…?’ Why would you discipline a child who was grieving for a lost friend or relative (in our case sibling) and recovering from the trauma of that loss when all they need is love, understanding and security? We feel we areContinueContinue reading “How do you discipline a grieving child?”
Category Archives: Living and grieving
An elephant in the room
There’s an elephant in the room. It is large and squatting, So it is hard to get around it. Yet we squeeze by with “How are you?” And “I’m fine” And a thousand other forms of trivial chatter. We talk about the weather. We talk about work. We talk about everything – except theContinueContinue reading “An elephant in the room”
Say her name… but not too much, Mum!
One of the biggest challenges I think I’ve faced since Abi’s death is understanding my other children’s different reactions. Contrary to my posts about openly talking about Abi and avoiding the elephant in the room, the approach with our children has had to be carefully considered. Abi has always been in their lives. Her sisterContinueContinue reading “Say her name… but not too much, Mum!”
Surviving grief
Surviving my bereavement is not something I feel I’ve achieved by any means, yet, but I am beginning to see that in order to survive the loss of my child, I’ve needed to find and maintain a balance between grieving and living. ‘Surviving’ feels like an unusual word to use when I consider that it’sContinueContinue reading “Surviving grief”
Olympic dreams
The start of the Winter Olympics has brought back memories of Abi’s excitement for the 2012 London Olympics. It is hard to know she is not here to watch this with us, no doubt she would have loved it. She followed the London Olympic events with interest and I can remember watching the amazing openingContinueContinue reading “Olympic dreams”
Tie a leopard-print ribbon…
Abi’s memorial has a cherry blossom tree next to it, but it’s only young, having been planted last May with her ashes. The first small buds are starting to form ready for springtime. So, while it’s still small and not much to look at, it is a poignant reminder that life carries on… Soon thereContinueContinue reading “Tie a leopard-print ribbon…”
You were so very special…
Another poem we chose for Abi’s church service, read by another uncle. You were so very, very special And were so from the start We held you in our arms But mainly in our hearts. And like a single drop of rain That on still waters fall, Your life did ripples make And touched theContinueContinue reading “You were so very special…”
Fundraising … far more than charity
A few days after Abi died, we were already thinking about how we could somehow give something back to the people who helped her, and as a way to remember her life. It’s hard to explain why, while sat in a hospital waiting room with my daughter still with us, I had this urge toContinueContinue reading “Fundraising … far more than charity”
To a Butterfly (1801)
A poem we chose to be read at Abi’s church funeral service, read beautifully by one of Abi’s uncles. It was one we’d read to her in the past and reminded us of her. I’ve watched you now a full half-hour; Self-poised upon that yellow flower And, little Butterfly! indeed I know not if youContinueContinue reading “To a Butterfly (1801)”
Abi’s dragonflies
I’ve just been browsing an old computer file of Abi’s artwork… random stories, computer drawings and images saved over the years. How interesting to find a file called DRAGON FLYS. It was created on 9th February 2009 … wow … four years before Abi died. She would have been nine years old then. There’s noContinueContinue reading “Abi’s dragonflies”
Chasing Dragonflies 